Not Your Average Death Blog
Why Losing Your Original Will Could Cost Your Family Everything
You’d think “filing” your Will would be simple. But as one listener, Jazmine from New Jersey, found out the hard way, it’s not that simple. She thought she had “filed” her Will with her attorney. When her house was burglarized and her important papers were stolen, she wasn’t worried about her Will. She assumed her attorney still had the original. Except, he didn’t. He’d been disbarred and his law firm no longer existed. And her original Will was gone. So, what does it even mean to “file” a Will? And what happens if yours goes missing?
Can You Leave Money to Your Dog?
Your dog might run your home, your heart, and your schedule, but legally, he’s still property.
You can’t leave money to your dog, because under the law, your dog is considered property. And property can’t inherit property.
But you can make sure your pet is cared for if you’re not around to do it. That’s where pet trusts come in.
We Don’t Plan Because We’re Old. We Plan Because We Care.
Every week on The Death Readiness Podcast, I hear from listeners who are deep in the trenches, raising kids, helping parents, juggling jobs, and trying to hold all the loose threads of family life together.
Sometimes, they write in with questions for #TuesdayTriage episodes, such as:
“How do I start talking to my parents about their Will?”
“What happens if I’m named as executor and don’t want the job?”
“How can I protect my kids if something happens to me?”
And sometimes, their messages are more personal.
Do You Really Need a Will? Here’s How to Tell.
Most people assume a Will is the first step in estate planning.
But a Will doesn’t control everything you own; and in some cases, you might decide you don’t even need one.
When I practiced as an estate attorney, one of the questions I got more than any other was,
“Do I need a Will?”
And my answer was always the same:
“I don’t know — not yet.”
Because before you can decide whether you need a Will, you have to understand what a Will actually does.
Why You Don’t Have to Take the Executor Job
When people find out they’ve been named Executor in a family member’s Will, the reaction is almost always the same: panic.
Not because they don’t care, but because they know the person who chose them never really got their affairs in order. The paperwork’s scattered, the passwords are missing, the beneficiary designations are outdated, and there’s no clear roadmap for what comes next.
But here’s the truth: you don’t have to take the job.
Death Readiness Is a Family Affair
I talk about death and estate planning a lot. It’s part of my work, my mission, and my daily conversations.
But nothing brings it home quite like seeing my daughter, April, wearing our latest Death Readiness merch. This is why I do what I do.
When Transfer-on-Death Deeds Promise to Avoid Probate but Create Chaos
We love shortcuts. Grocery store self-checkout. The “express” car wash. Even skipping steps in estate planning, like using a Ladybird deed (also called a transfer-on-death deed) to keep your house out of probate.
On the surface, a Ladybird deed looks amazing. Sign a deed, name who gets the house, and no court gets involved. Cheap, simple, done. Except, like most things in estate planning, what sounds easy can turn into a mess for the people you leave behind.
Today, I sit down with Minnesota probate attorney Jen Gumbel to dig into the good, the bad, and the ugly of transfer-on-death deeds. She’s seen firsthand how they play out in real life, and the results aren’t always pretty.
Do You Need to Update Your Will When You Have More Kids?
Leslie signed her Will five years ago when she had one child. Then she had twins. Now she’s got three kids, and she’s wondering: does her Will still work, or does she need to change it?
It’s a question I get all the time. And the answer is… it depends.
Good estate planning attorneys use solid forms that account for future kids. For example, my own Will doesn’t just name my children; it includes any child “born or adopted after the date of this Will.” That way, if my family grows, the Will automatically grows with it.
How Small Gaps in Your Will Become Big Problems
Twelve years after my mom died, her jewelry still lives in my dad’s house. My sister and I each picked out the pieces we wanted, and I even used one of her rings as my engagement ring.
The rest was tucked away in her dresser drawer until my daughter, April, started exploring them this summer. April never met my mom, but when she wore her grandmother’s earrings to homecoming last weekend, it was like she’d found a way to connect with her.
Jewelry can be a bridge between generations. But in estate planning, it can also be the opposite: the spark that lights a family feud.
6 Steps to Finding the Right Estate Planning Attorney for Your Situation
Finding the right estate planning attorney can feel overwhelming and choosing the wrong one can cost you time, money, and peace of mind. In today’s Tuesday Triage, Jill walks you through six practical steps to help you identify the right fit for your needs, avoid common pitfalls, and trust your instincts throughout the process. Whether your estate is simple or more complex, these tips will give you clarity and confidence in choosing the attorney who can best serve you and your family. Here’s a summary of the tips Jill offered on today’s podcast.
From Problem-Aware to Solution-Aware: Why Families Get Stuck in Estate Planning
Most of us know we should have an estate plan.
But knowing there’s a problem doesn’t always mean knowing how to solve it.
That difference is the gap between being problem-aware and solution-aware, and it explains so much about why families put off planning, even when the need is obvious.
Why Your Business Needs an Estate Plan, Too
What would happen to your business if you didn’t come back after a long weekend? Would your clients get what they’ve paid for? Would invoices get paid? Would anyone even know where to start?
This week’s Tuesday Triage question came from Julie in Virginia, who runs an online business and wanted to know if her business needs an estate plan. The answer is simple: yes.
Because planning isn’t just about what happens if something goes wrong; it’s about agency. It’s about building a business that can survive a sale, a sabbatical, or the unexpected.
What Really Happens to DIY Wills in Probate Court
When most people say “I just want to avoid probate,” what they really mean is: I want things to be clear and simple. Today I sat down with Probate Court Judge Andra Hedrick from Davidson County, Tennessee, to demystify what probate actually is, why clarity matters, and how well‑intended “simple” Wills (handwritten notes, internet forms, AI drafts) can create complicated outcomes later on.
A Will isn’t a magic key the moment you sign it. It becomes legally effective only IF the court admits it to probate, confirming the basic requirements (like the right signatures, witnesses, and formalities) have been met.
Why Banks Reject Powers of Attorney for Trust Accounts
Have you ever been surprised when a bank accepts a power of attorney for one account but rejects it for another? That’s exactly what happened to Lindsey from Tennessee. She could use her dad’s power of attorney for his checking and savings accounts, but when she tried to use it to access his trust accounts, the bank said no — and didn’t explain why.
Why Naming the Caregiver Adult Child (instead of your Spouse with Dementia) as Beneficiary of your IRA Can Backfire
It’s a situation many families face: a healthy parent wants to make sure their spouse with dementia is cared for if the healthy parent dies first. The instinct might be to name the caregiving adult child as the beneficiary of the IRA — trusting them to use the funds for the parent who needs care. But what seems simple can actually put both the money and the spouse with dementia at risk.
What Every Parent Needs to Know When Their Child Turns 18
When your child legally becomes an adult at age 18, a lot changes.
You can still pay their tuition, keep them on your health insurance, pack their favorite snacks for the dorm. But in a medical emergency, you don’t have a right to their healthcare information.
Sadly, most parents don’t realize this until there’s an unexpected crisis.
Today on The Death Readiness Podcast, I share the stories of two young women whose families fought landmark legal battles because neither had signed an advance healthcare directive before tragedy struck. Their stories made national headlines, and they also left a legacy we can learn from.
Why Prenups Aren’t Just for the Rich (or the Divorcing)
Most people associate prenuptial agreements with cynicism, mistrust, or worst-case scenarios. But what if we’ve been looking at them all wrong?
In this week’s episode of The Death Readiness Podcast, we’re flipping the script. I sit down with family dynamics coach, Emily Bouchard, to talk about how hard, honest, ongoing conversations about money can actually strengthen relationships.
What You Need to Know About Medicaid and Protecting Your Mom’s House
I get asked this all the time: “Should we put mom’s house in a trust in case she needs nursing home care?”
In today’s Tuesday Triage episode, I answer that question through the story of a listener named Eileen. She’s 73, lives alone in upstate New York, and owns her home. Her son-in-law thinks she should put her house in a trust to “protect it from the government.” Eileen’s not so sure.
Why You Need (or Don’t Need) a Trust
If you’ve ever been told, “You need a trust,” and didn’t quite know what that meant, you’re not alone.
It’s something people hear from well-meaning friends, financial advisors, or maybe even their parents. But rarely does anyone slow down and explain why you might need one or whether it makes sense for your situation.
That’s what this week’s Tuesday Triage episode is all about.
Preparing for your Parent’s Cognitive Decline Before it’s too Late
When a parent’s health starts to decline, the questions you never wanted to ask become urgent. Bills still need to be paid, decisions still need to be made. Are you legally allowed to step in?
This week on our first Tuesday Triage episode, I tackled a question from a listener named Molly. Her situation might sound familiar to you.